Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

You are like me, then.

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

How do Democrat Party voters feel about the fact that Kamala Harris never received one primary vote to be the nominee in 2020 and certainly not in 2024?

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

Be who you already are.

Wout van Aert rode harder than ever on the Finestre to help deliver Simon Yates to Giro d’Italia victory - Cycling Weekly

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.

It’s still here.

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You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

It’s here now, writing to you.

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

Why is rap* a crime?

The sadness was still there.

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

What are the potential benefits of going without clothes at home for a few days without any specific reason?

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

I was tired of fighting.

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

Why do people have trouble accepting the very true fact that "The Blue Marble" photo of Earth is a composite and therefore (just like every other subsequent "picture" of Earth NASA has ever shown us) not a real photo but computer generated?

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

Destiny 2: The Edge Of Fate Draws On Metroidvanias To Bring You Back In - GameSpot

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.

When Trump blames DEI, isn't he just saying "it must be because there's black or brown people involved"?

I had run out of hope.

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

And the sadness?

What do you think of Hegseth calling The Atlantic journalist Jeffrey Goldberg, "a deceitful and highly discredited so-called journalist who has made a profession of peddling hoaxes” after team Trump texted him their top-secret war plans on Yemen?

I was tired of trying and failing.

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.